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    21 August

    马肥毛长(上)

    最近以一种肉眼可见的速度变胖。
    腰上的肉总是很华丽的抖动,在我不穿裤子的时候。
    每天早上吸足了气才能把皮带扣上,然后放松,滚滚肥肉就把裤腰推向裤腿。
    上周体检,测出了140/100的血压新纪录,医生拍拍我的肩膀说,年轻人,有前途。
    临走医生还抓着我的手说,我们医院,最新降压药结合进口仪器配备专家一对一治疗,无副作用疗效快,绝不反弹,一次入院终身治愈,花一份钱省一生事,现在预约,发VIP卡送单人间,开发3个病患全部药费8折,消费满10W再酬宾送半年住院时间。。。。。。
    我抬起一脚踹在他DD上让他蹦着进了厕所,要不是看公司几个部长也在我早把他拖到电梯那再用门夹两下。
    后来我就开始找一切可能的时间运动,在网上捣腾一阵找了几个网球群跟人家混球打。打球的那帮人都很生猛,看名字就能看出来,什么狼,鸦,老鼠,兔子,helloKitty,小白,饭饭,兰兰,好吧,AV控们提意见了,我承认最后2个名字是杜撰的。
    人胖了,面对的舆论压力也同比增长。比如我吃饭,吃得多了,人家就说,哇噻,格模子不是盖的,就是能吃啊;吃得少了,人家说,哇噻,格身板就吃这么点啊,装啥秀气啦;我忍着怒火,吃得不多不少,人家又说,唉,吃饭还要克制着吃,人胖是比较辛苦哦。我胖你¥&×(%×¥,这饭还让不让人吃了。
    后来连lp也说,我仔细看了看你以前的照片,你还是瘦比较帅唉~~~我崩溃了,变成了拼图一片片往地上掉。lpDR看到我受打击的样子,忙说,现在也比较可爱。。。
    一只乌鸦,拖着一串省略号飞过,啊啊叫个不停。。。。
    夜深人静的时候,我颓然倒在床边,抚摸自己的肚子,无比哀怨地叹道,我的小肚腩。。。
                                                                                                                                                                                 。。。未完待续
     
     

    Comments (5)

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    xinru caiwrote:
    出来喝酒
    9 Oct.
    振霄 朱wrote:
    欣赏弄,侧那!
    24 Aug.
    di feiwrote:
    呵呵
    期待下篇~~~~~
    22 Aug.
    沙巴 陈wrote:
    人变胖了怎么连文风也变了。。。好久没见了啊,不知胖到什么程度了,我最近已经瘦下来了,和大学的时候差不多了,努力啊鲁胖
    22 Aug.
    Young Youngwrote:
    你果然適合杜撰,誇大誇大誇大,要忠於事實,做人要厚道,做豬尤其需要!
    22 Aug.

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